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Song title | |||
"ハルノ寂寞" Romaji: Haru no Sekibaku English: The Desolation of Spring Official English: Loneliness of Spring | |||
Original Upload Date | |||
May 13, 2021 | |||
Singer | |||
Tsurumaki Maki | |||
Producer(s) | |||
Views | |||
540,000+ (NN), 9,600,000+ (YT) | |||
Links | |||
Niconico Broadcast / YouTube Broadcast | |||
Description
One of Maki's demonstration songs. |
Alternate Versions
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Demo Song Audition Version |
Upload date: December 23, 2020 |
Featuring: Tsurumaki Maki |
Producer(s): inabakumori (music, lyrics) Nukunuku Nigirimeshi (illustration) |
YT |
The first known public version of the song. This is a half-a-minute-long, near-acapella demo with the provisional title 『Synthesizer V 弦巻マキ』デモソング試聴版 ("Synthesizer V Tsurumaki Maki" Demo Song Audition Version).
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English version |
Upload date: October 3, 2021 |
Featuring: Tsurumaki Maki |
Producer(s): inabakumori (music, lyrics) Nukunuku Nigirimeshi (illustration) |
YT |
An English version of the same song.
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Lyrics
Japanese | Romaji | English |
何回も傷付いて | nankai mo kizutsuite | I’ve been hurt so many times |
ぽっかり穴が空いていたので | pokkari ana ga aite ita no de | and left with a gaping wide hole inside so |
針を通して引き攣っていたんだよ | hari o tooshite hikitsutte itan da yo | I pulled a needle through it to shut it tight |
何日も守り抜いて | nannichi mo mamorinuite | Holding fast 'til the end of so many days |
重たくたって口を閉じて | omotakutatte kuchi o tojite | Shutting my mouth no matter how heavy it was |
破けるくらいに抱えてみたんだよ | yabukeru kurai ni kakaete mitan da yo | Tried to hold on ’til I started to break apart |
何回も傷付いて | nankai mo kizutsuite | I’ve been hurt so many times |
空いた穴を縫って隠して | aita ana o nutte kakushite | Sewed shut and hid the hole that you left |
なるべく永く一緒に居たいんだよ | narubeku nagaku issho ni itain da yo | I wanted to be with you as long as I possibly could |
何日も守り抜いて | nannichi mo mamorinuite | Holding fast 'til the end of so many days |
吐きたくたって歯を食いしばっただけ | hakitakuta tte ha o kuishibatta dake | I wanted to spit it all out, but could only grin and bear it |
抱えてもらって痛んだよ | kakaete moratte itanda yo | It hurt you know, having you hold me |
無理矢理口を閉じたって苦しくないわ | muriyariguchi o tojita tte kurushikunai wa | Even as I was forced to keep my mouth shut, it didn’t hurt to do that |
くたびれたあたしが駄目だったんだね | kutabireta atashi ga dame dattan da ne | I was too worn out to be good enough, I guess |
まだ役に立つつもりだったけれど | mada yakunitatsu tsumori datta keredo | I thought I could still be of some use to you but, |
ちぎれる前に思いやりすれ違ってきみとさようなら | chigireru mae ni omoiyari surechigatte kimi to sayounara | Before I'm ripped apart, I say goodbye to you, who passed right by my kindness |
くたびれたあたしが駄目だったんだね | kutabireta atashi ga dame dattan da ne | I was too worn out to be good enough, I guess |
まだきみの匂いも残っているよ | mada kimi no nioi mo nokotte iru yo | Your scent is still lingering with me |
ちぎれる前に少しだけ名残惜しそうにさようなら | chigireru mae ni sukoshi dake nagorioshisou ni sayounara | Before I’m ripped apart, I say goodbye, looking just a little reluctant to part |
何回も傷付いてきた顔も体もまだ使えるよ | nankai mo kizutsuite kita kao mo karada mo mada tsukaeru yo | Despite being hurt so many times, this face and this body, they can still be used |
捨てないで 誰かに譲らないで欲しいだけなの | sutenaide dareka ni yuzuranaide hoshii dake na no | Don’t throw me away. All I ask is that you don't just give me up to someone else |
くたびれたあたしが駄目だった | kutabireta atashi ga dame datta | I was too worn out to be good enough |
くたびれたあたしが駄目だったんだね | kutabireta atashi ga dame dattan da ne | I was too worn out to be good enough, I guess |
頼られていると思い込んでいるよ | tayorarete iru to omoikonde iru yo | I was so sure that you needed me |
ちぎれる前の新品未使用のあたしに勝てやしない | chigireru mae no shinpin mishiyou no atashi ni kateyashinai | At least before I was ripped apart, when I was still shiny and new, you wouldn’t have won against me |
くたびれたあたしが駄目だったんだね | kutabireta atashi ga dame dattan da ne | I was too worn out to be good enough, I guess |
色褪せただけ思い出していけるよ | iroaseta dake omoidashite ikeru yo | The colours have faded but I can remember it still |
ちぎれた後に少しだけ名残惜しそうにさようなら | chigireta ato ni sukoshi dake nagorioshisou ni sayounara | After being ripped apart, I say goodbye to you, looking just a little reluctant to part |
Hurt over and over again
A gaping hole opened in me
So I pulled the needle through it
Protecting it for so long
It was so heavy, my mouth fell shut
I tried carrying it with me so long that it feels like I'll break
Hurt over and over again
I sewed the hole within me to shut it
I want to be with you for as long as I can
Protecting it for so long
I wanted to throw up- but I simply gritted my teeth
It hurts to carry it for you
Even though I forced my mouth closed, I'm fine
I wasn't good enough worn out, huh
Though I was still intending to be of some use
With all due consideration, I'll pass by you and say goodbye
I wasn't good enough worn out, huh
Your scent is left hanging in the air
Before it tears off I'll say goodbye with a twinge of regret
They've been hurt so many times, but I can still use this face, this body
Don't throw it away, all I want is for it to never be given to anyone else
I wasn't good enough worn out...
I wasn't good enough worn out, huh
I got it in my head that you're relying on me
There's no way I can win against my factory-sealed self, before it tore off
I wasn't good enough worn out, huh
I'll remember only what it looks like when the color from it has faded
After it tears off
I'll say goodbye with a twinge of regret
Been hurt so many times
A big hole’s been opened so
Been putting a needle through, pulling together
Protected it for many days
Closed my heavy lips
Held it together almost exploding
Been hurt so many times
Sewed the opened hole and hid
I want to try to be with you for as long as I can
Protected it for many days
Clenched my teeth when I wanted to spit it out
You know it hurt, being held
It’s not painful forcing it to close
I guess it’s my fault because I was exhausted
I thought I could still be of use
Before ripping off, our compassion slip past each other and we say goodbye
I guess it’s my fault because I was exhausted
Your smell still lingers
Before ripping off a little reluctantly, a goodbye
My face, my body hurt so many times but still can be used
Don’t leave me, I just don’t want you to give it to someone else
It is my fault because I was exhausted
I guess it’s my fault because I was exhausted
I’m thinking I was depended on
Can’t win against me before I was ripped up, brand new and unused
I guess it’s my fault because I was exhausted
I can still remember, I’ve just lost color
After ripping off a little reluctantly, a goodbye
External Links
- Google Drive - Instrumental